Name:Thomas Country:United States State:New York Metro:Poughkeepsie Birthday:10/25/1987 Gender:Male
Interests:Music, gaming, and hanging with my friends Expertise:taking a flaming sword of fortitude and shoving it up your @$$ Occupation:Student/Cvs/Barn Industry:Other
i'v hit it, somewhere in me is just a mental wall i can't climb over. i'v gone as far as i can in everything really. School i'v just hit a wall and have no more to push me to go further. I don't have the drive to listen,study or even go. Hell i go out of habit more then anything else. Even tho i'm working a second job to pay the 412 bucks every month so i can go there i still can't do it. I can't grasp anymore of it. I'v been throwing the idea around that i should just be stuck like dad and ma, that i can't get any further and just need to accept that i'll work dead end jobs and worry about paying everything for the rest of my life. Is this what adulthood is, hopefully paying some debt off and working your ass off to go nowhere in which you already know you won't get far.
or lack there of. i mean christ i couldn't push myself hard to do anything even if i fell off a boat into an ocean of motivation and drive. I tell myself i need to push to do better in school to get out of it so i can move on but i go into class and i just blank out and i can't focus at all to the teacher no matter the subject. Its just not there in me to go foward, to achieve better for myself. Everyone could be telling me that i need to but i got nothing. Nothin in my head clicks and goes, OH! you should study for a test or OH! you should be paying attention instead of drifting off into lah lah land. god knows haha
also can't get this spill canvas song outta my head, love the lyrics especially the chorus part
There are things in this world That I don't understand Like love, war, gravity Or the lay of the land But all of these, remain mysteries One thing is for sure You are worth living for.
its "one thing is for sure by the spill canvas", good stuff
